'Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person' Offers Up a Sweet Bloodsucker Romance

​Speaking as someone who grew up in the Midwest, it isn’t easy being a vegetarian in a society where meat is king and the only veggie option is often a side salad with a few croutons tossed in. Not to mention the constant jabs or proclamations that you’ll grow weak without eating flesh (not true, by the way). French director Ariane Louis-Sieze bites into those feelings of becoming a dietary outsider with her mesmerizing debut feature, Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person. A long title, sure, but one that gets right to the neck of the matter in this romantic comedy much sweeter than your average bloodsucker film.
 
Louis-Seize and Christine Doyon’s script introduces us to Sasha (an utterly captivating Sara Montpetit), a humanist vampire who despises the idea of killing. Has never done it, in fact. Desperate to teach her how to hunt for herself, her parents force her to move in with cousin Denise (Noémie O’Farrell), a ruthless huntress. But with Sasha continuing to refuse, she finds herself slowly dying, until she meets a lonely boy named Paul (Félix-Antoine Bénard). Wishing to depart this mortal plane, he offers himself to Sasha as her first kill, propelling the two into a night of self-discovery and of course, bloodshed.
 
Have you ever sat on a bus at night as it creeps along, the neon of the city streets reflecting off your features while you listen to soft jazz drifting into your bones? That’s the cool, calm vibe of Humanist Vampire. A gentle film in nearly every aspect, it sucks you into a hidden world where there are vampire doctors (all dressed in red, because what else). All of whom say there is a problem with Sasha. Where her vampiric nature should make her hungry at the thought of human death, she feels compassion instead. Horror movies scare her. One vampiric psychiatrist even claims the girl may have PTSD from the many murders she has witnessed her family commit. Mom (Sophie Cadieux) wants to make Sasha learn how to kill, while Dad (Steve Laplante) isn’t so keen on the idea. Through it all, Louis-Seize and cinematographer Shawn Pavlin create a warm atmosphere, lights dim, shadows heavy, neon reds and blues bright. Sasha’s a woman who yearns for the romanticism of life, not the gruesome horror so often associated with her kind.

What little violence there is within Humanist Vampire remains as in the dark as a bat. Louis-Seize gives us just enough bloody aftermath to understand the terror Sasha witnesses, but never makes that the focus. Subtle comedy and cute companionship are the main veins tapped here. Think Let the Right One In without the gore and manipulation, or What We Do in the Shadows with more romance and softer comedic bits. The film’s sense of humor lies in things like a clown putting on a show for Sasha’s birthday, only to perform a magic trick that lands him in a trunk with handcuffs on to the delight of her parents. Big laughs come few and far between, but it’s easy to find yourself with a fang-toothed grin at the light humor throughout. Especially considering Montpetit and Bénard have such adorable chemistry together. Watching them, you almost feel like a parent sending your kid off to prom, joy at the thought of them finding love conflicting with the sense that something may go terribly wrong. Paul wants to die after all, bullied and harassed by his peers. Like Before Sunrise but with a vampire, you spend the runtime relishing in the pair’s nervous smiles and touching moments such as a particularly beautiful dance scene, knowing just as well as the characters that it will have to come to an end eventually.
 
Predictability and a steady flatline of tension are the nicks in the teeth that may keep Humanist Vampire from turning some viewers into fans (fan-gs?). Since neither the comedy nor the violence bite hard, Louis-Sieze’s film becomes more of a slow—though never boring—drain with few surprises along the way. It wraps the audience in a warm cape of clumsy teenage love, using Sasha and Paul’s “exchange” as a metaphor for losing their virginity. An apt use of vampiric bites, but one that makes it a bit head-scratching as to why the film doesn’t bring the pair together sooner. They don’t actually speak to each other until about midway through, taking long steps to establish their personal existence but lightening the impact of their relationship in the process by giving it less time to breathe and develop while also taking too long to get to the blood of the premise. Still, Louis-Sieze and the engaging performances of the cast draw you in anyway, made easier by universal feelings of loneliness and finding that one person who shines like a light through it all, the bit of sunshine that won’t kill Sasha.
 
A stylish “meat” cute that (mostly) takes place over the course of one magical night, Humanist Vampire satisfies a different sort of vampiric craving. Its bite is toothless (not a negative, in this case). Its heart beats instead of withering from blood loss. It’s a charming coming of age tale for those who wish to see the softer side of vampires without taking their edge away (looking at you, Twilight). More than anything, it’s a sweet story that takes the undead and those who wish for death and, if only for a moment, allows them to feel truly and utterly alive.

Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person bites into limited theaters in LA and NY on June 21st, followed by a nationwide rollout soon after. 

By Matt Konopka